Focus......

“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.”- Arnold Schwarzenegger
“The worst thing I can be is the same as everybody else. I hate that.” -Arnold Schwarzenegger

FIGURING OUT THE FIFTIES.... SO THIS IS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT.......

Wednesday 10 March 2010

Wow! Thats Amazingly Huge!

Deep Breath......
Be warned this is going to be a long post....
Mainly so I can get this right inside MY head and to let you know why I will not be competing in April or May or maybe even 2010....

ok, so here is my day....

5am in the gym for 60 Minutes of Cardio, then home and eggy oats, shower, off to work, tuna rice and green beans for morning tea and no more food or WATER allowed after 11am as I had to have an empty belly for the Ultrasound on my Abs at 2pm...

I was having the ultrasound done as I had a very informative and helpful chat with LizN regarding Abdominal Muscle Separation (yes there is a fancy word for it which at this point I can not remember) and how this may be affecting my back and if they were in fact separated enough I might be able to have this helped by having a Tummy Tuck...

2pm I arrive starving and thirsty ready for the ultrasound... lovely technician starts with my upper stomach Not my Abs but what lies beneath .. why??? Cause she can... she admits that for no other reason than to "check things out" .. So the first 15 mins are spent looking at gallbladder, pancreas, liver, liver, liver, liver, measurements of liver, liver, more measurements of liver, right hand kidney, liver, left hand kidney...liver... more measurement of liver... THEN Abs yep we have separation yay!! I am happy camper, that explains the lack of strength in my abs and my back problems after doing ab exercises... It also means that I may be able to have them repaired!!!

Hang on why are we back looking at my liver???

I am asked to wait while the head Radiologist is called in... hanging out for a drink of water and falling asleep when he arrives 5 minutes later.. he asks me about my liver... no nothing wrong with the thing that I know of, I'm here about the separation in the abs... which he agrees I do have and is amazed to see in a "Skinny and obviously very fit woman as it is a fat womens problem" I point out that I was a fat woman and that's probably why I have the problem... We do the whole.. "No you?" "yes me - huge", "No Really?" conversation.... Then...

He mentions that they have found this thing... in my liver... an amazing thing the size of a softball... 8cms round... its amazing!!! he has NEVER seen one this big before its fabulously huge He smiles!!!

Ok I have a weird sense of humour but hell this Radiologist beats me hands down!!!

So since I am lying here, and because this thing is so amazingly huge, how about we slide you straight onto the CAT scan machine?????

ummm my first thought was... Water? Food? but no none of that yet... it is now 3pm and I haven't had anything since 11am, so deliriously hungry and thirsty I pop through the waiting room quickly tell Hubby a quick version of the good news, bad news story and straight onto a CAT scan machine where I spend the next hour and 15 mins having a quizillion photos taken with and without the added enhancement of die in the bloodstream... once again my only thoughts were.. will the die make me stop dying of thirst??? yes I was delirious and yes that was an intended pun...

By the time I got out of there Hubby was getting very worried about what ever the hell the lump was and I had missed my Kelli appointment, although I will openly admit that at this stage my fat levels were not upper most in my mind... water was, then food, then the hugely amazing, opps sorry Amazingly Huge Lump (to be now known as the AHL)

Turns out the AHL, which I have probably had growing inside all my life, is suspected to be, for want of the appropriately medically long name, a puddle of blood, of which I also have several smaller far less spectacular ones also lurking in my liver. Unfortunately due the the AHL being so large there is a chance that it may just decided one day to explode... although this is just pure speculation as one this amazingly huge is not common enough for anyone to really know... or if I am hit in the appropriate place by some hooker heel wielding jealous harpy figure competitor at a show that may burst it.... And there in lies the problems..

Dr Sarah is being an absolutely fabulously awesome Dr and contacting the head of the Liver specialists in Brisbane to ask about getting me in to have someone else be amazed at the hugeness of this lump and probably to have an MRI and then who knows what...

So until that happens, no competitions for me, obviously.. as I have to stay away from hooker heeled jealous harpy figure competitors... and although I am allowed to train and do mild cardio no leaping from tall buildings in a single bound... damn I had that planned for Friday too...

Ohhh and all the bloods came back normal and even in some cases excellent.... Except of course for the liver ones and even though they were not as normal as they should be, if it wasn't for the discovery of the AHL they would have been considered normal enough, but now they are suspiciously not normal enough...

Finally got to eat at 6pm... yes it was banana bread... 2 slices... what the fuck do you expect! But then we had chicken and salad for dinner and the lunches etc are all as unnormally normal for tomorrow. I will be still be eating as if I am competing some time this year and I will definitely still be training...

I will also be blogging... unless there is this internal sort of a splat noise then who knows... sorry but until I know what the AHL is I refuse to take it seriously enough to do anything other than be pissed at it for messing with my plans for this year, especially not being able to have my Abs corrected...

Well the washing machine just beeped which is my call back to normality and life as I know it...

***SPLAT****

hehehehehehe

11 comments:

Lauren said...

OMG what a day and what an outcome! You are just too super special Cath! We all talk about not wanting to be like the average joe and that is why we eat and train like we do, but I do believe you have just taken it all to a new level of 'non averageness'!!! lol!

Your journey is always amazing to follow and now you have given us a new path to follow you on. Best of luck with it all and we are all here to support you!

Vix said...

Hey Cath,
Wow what a day! I hope that this gets sorted ASAP for you (and in a good way, not a SPLAT way!).
It's great that you are so determined to keep plugging away but also probably best if you do take the doctor's precautions too and not go too hard with it all!! We want you to make it back up on stage in one unsplattered piece!!

Vic x

PS - thanks for the banana bread cravings. AGAIN!! LOL

Charlotte Orr said...

Glad to see you haven't lost your sense of humour. Best wishes for the future.

mq01 said...

shit. ok now i have to tell you, the word veri i got when commenting to you yesterday was "nonpro". i stopped myself from telling you, i didnt want to jinx anything. i kid you not :(

they'll drain the AHL and you'll be back to slaying hooker heel yielding samurais chicks in NO TIME, i AM sure of it! and, i think the doors opening in your path are larger than we can possibly imagine. i really do :)

so, meanwhile, i say get your hair extensions anyway since we know we love them, have some banana bread, have a nice waterfront run when you have time, enjoy your continuing coursework, think about the tummy tuck coming, and pat bitch broom a little more :-D woohoo!

XOXO witchazel! you're amazing! we need a ride and another bottle now... ;) ps, hmmm, todays word veri is "reporter". hmmm...

Laynie: the Marketing Muscle said...

Its your health and fitness focus in the first place that led you to make this discovery BEFORE anything bad happened. It will be your fitness that accelerates your recovery. It will be the love of your family and friends that strengthens and support you in "those" moments. It is your attitude that shines a light for the rest of us when we are meeting our fears. My scan for an unknown breast thickening is soon, and although 99% positive, I am scared as hell. A competition does not determine who the TRUE Champions of Life are. You are a true Champion if you never slay any more sniffy little princesses in heels on stage again! x

Raechelle said...

Wow-scary! But glad you are taking it in stride. Total bummer about not competing...but I don't think your heart was really in it this year...will you still be a spectator at the Asia Pacific? Was really hoping to meet you!

Take care of your health...and don't overdo it! Especially since you don't have a clue what IT is..besides AHL.

Tara said...

wow Cathy!!! good thing it was discovered before it ruptured! hope you can get it fixed asap!!

xxx

LizN said...

thank goodness you found it now..take care you poor bugger!

KRISTIN said...

Cathy, you never cease to amaze me at your strength and determination to always look, if not at the bright side, but at making a bright side of something that for anyone else could be such a downer. You are one amazing woman and I wish you all the best in recovering from your AHL... and I always look forward to your uncanny ability to make everything an absolute crack up!

Take care of yoursef.... there are ALWAYS going to be more comps... Thinking of you xo

sarahz said...

Gosh! just aswell you went for the scan or you may never have known.

Would like to know what you found out about ab muscle separation as I have it to but was told they would have to make a huge cut to fix it and I thought it wasn't worth it, but not sure this is correct.

Witchazel said...

Thanks everyone for your great comments... Having you here helps me so very much, you really are a fabulous supportive bunch!

Sarahzam.. check out some cosmetic surgery sites, they explain the procedure for a tumy tuck, from what I found it appears that you are left with a scar similar to having a C section - from hip to hip, but since it is done by a cosmetic surgeon it is very fine and although it doesn't disappear it does fade and is hidden by your bikini... Medicare does not cover it even if you need it for your ab muscles but there is some piddly little rebate which is better than nothing :o)