Ghost of shit times past....

I am in pain.........

I have now been in pain for over a week.........

It seems that my back problems from last year have returned....

Which in every day terms is early arthritis and two dics compressed which between the arthritis and the dics is the nerve that runs around my arse, down my thigh, across my shin and onto my foot.. This causes a burning stabbing hot knife pain down my right shin.... which is a pain that is beyond "fuck that hurts!!"

I would say... using the fabulous medical scale of "So Cath, using a range from 1 to 10 with 1 being hardly any pain at all and 10 being fucking sore what would you say your pain level is?" well I would say 37...

What is the most frustrating thing about this 37 pain is that I don't have it very much during the day... during the day it sits at around 3... but when I lay down to sleep... well then it waits till I have been asleep for 30 minutes then wham right up to 37!!!!!!

So for the last week I have spent every night pacing the floor waiting for the pain killers that I am almost chewing and Zen oil that I am smothered in to finally kick in...

The pain isn't affecting my training except that I am so tired from the sleepless nights that training is exhausting me and I am running out of steam before the end of the session... mostly because by the time I am training at night I have been awake for over 14 hours..

Last night I crawled into bed at 8.30 but was then up and pacing at 11.18, 1.24, then 2.47 and finally gave up and got ready for the gym at 4.13... Still I managed to get a lot of stuff done super quietly so I didn't wake Hubby while waiting for the gym to open....

The problem with being up at all these times during the night is that every time I get up the fur kids think its morning and leap around all bouncy and happy to see me... by the end of the night my snarls are enough to keep them firmly on their beds looking the other way hoping that the Head of the Pack Bitch doesn't look their way... LOL

I can still do the cardio on the cross trainer without pain, sitting at work is niggly but tolerable and tonight I even trained back and biceps with just a couple of twinges...

The annoying thing is I know it is a waste of time seeing the Doc and I have already been told that there is no cure... none, at "my age" it is early to have the arthritis but there is nothing to be done for it... I was advised to take pain killers and anti inflammatory drugs if it hurts... not being great at popping random pain killing pills this has been a last resort for me...

So in the meantime I am tired, grumpy, sore, bloated and dry from the pain killers and totally pissed and frustrated as all I want to do is train.... ohh and sleep would be good to.

My pre-comp diet is still spot on even though my inner Gloom Child keeps telling me that something sweet will make me feel better... nah bitch it ain't happening so go play on the road!

So I will just hang on to the hope that it will go away like it has in the past... that whatever I did to make it come back and get me will not happen again... and that I will get some sleep tonight for longer than the pain killers last....